The Two Eileens Strike Again! by Eileen O'Finlan

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It was my great pleasure to once again team up with fellow BWL author, Eileen Charbonneau for a couple of library talks and book signings. As some of you may already know, Eileen Charbonneau and I have the same name. (O'Finlan is a pen name. My real last name is Charbonneau). We didn't know it until about a year ago, but we are distant cousins. Maybe our shared DNA is what makes us such a great team. Whatever, the reason, I'm grateful for it as it is sheer joy to work with Eileen. We've created a presentation in two parts with Eileen doing the first part and me picking up where she leaves off. It flows seamlessly and seems to be greatly appreciated by every audience for whom we've presented.

This time around we spoke at two libraries in Massachusetts – the Shrewsbury Public Library and the Worcester Public Library. After each talk, we opened it up for Q&A. Eileen and I were quite gratified by the interest and knowledge of the audiences at both libraries. Attendees asked thoughtful questions, made insightful comments, and (bless them!) gave us kind compliments. I've had wonderfully responsive audiences when I've spoken solo, but there's something about the two of us together that really stimulates those who attend. Perhaps it's because Eileen and I manage to play off each other so well. Often we're able to add to each other's comments, which offers a deeper, more meaningful answer to a question. Whatever it is, folks who came to our two talks were certainly animated. Questions kept coming from every direction. If the librarian at the Worcester Public Library hadn't stepped in, we might still be there. These audiences were knowledgeable, as well. We learned as much from them as they did from us. The give and take is invaluable!

Eileen Charbonneau at Worcester Public Library

Eileen O'Finlan at Worcester Public Library

On the days between our scheduled appearances we had the opportunity to have a little fun. We shopped in some unique places, visited the Worcester Art Museum, and even got in a little research for the sequel to Kelegeen which will be set in Worcester in the 1850s. Eileen was game for playing the part of research assistant, so we visited the Salisbury Mansion and the Worcester Historical Museum. What a treasure trove of information we found at both places!

Eileen Charbonneau makes some great finds at Ed Hyder's Mediterranean Marketplace

The Two Eileens having some fun at the Worcester Art Museum

(That helmuet was HEAVY!)

The Salisbury Mansion built in 1772

Sewing Machine one of my characters would have used
Worcester Historical Museum

Map of Worcester in 1851
Worcester Historical Museum

If you're an author planning to give talks my advice is if you can find a partner to present with, do it. It's fun for the authors and their audiences. You don't have to have the same name, but somehow it seems to help.

Do critiques have to be cruel?

Beta readers, writing partners, and family give us feedback and,

– supportive, positive and useful feedback is possible.

In 1986 twenty-five newbie writers survived a writing course and started a writers’ group for the support and education of writers. Among us were a few who had suffered cruelty at the hands of a particular published author. As an instructor, she’d shredded her students writing. It didn’t take the group long to figure out we needed a way to help writers give positive but useful feedback.

We didn’t want to end up with the Aunt Martha approach. ‘This is lovely, dear. You’re a good writer.” The comment might or might not be true. Either way, it’s not useful.

Writers, like most people, react badly to harsh comments. That was our starting point. Comments such as ‘this sucks’ were banned. However, without feedback, we don’t grow as writers. What to do? A few of us sat down with a bottle of wine and did what writers do, we brainstormed what we’d want in a critique and how’d we do ‘unto others’ the same.

Thirty-one years later, that manifesto is still given to new group members. The method we devised provides support, validation, and tips to do better. It is also simple to use. It is, I believe, one of the reasons our group is flourishing after 31 years and holds the reputation as the best group in the area for learning writing craft.

This is what we use.

1)      Process:

·         State what you like about the story or the character and a particularly lovely phrasing.

·         Put in what you liked about the main characters. You might mark a bit of dialogue as ‘for me, this seemed out of character for Ms. Smith. Is there a reason she broke character? If so the reader needs to know.’

·         Please avoid negative statements like—this doesn’t work. Your character is a wimp.

·         State what emotion or image you experienced when reading the whole book or specific scenes.

·         Identify any place where you were confused or found inconsistencies.

·         Underline passive verb structures, non-specific word use, overuse of adverbs, adjective + noun structures where stronger “showing” verbs would be better, and negative structures that could be positive.

2) Tone and attitude:

Structure critique comments as questions or suggestions.

2)      Sample Comments

1.      This is a strong verb – I can see action here.

2.      Colorful description-I like it.

3.      Evocative turn of phrase, it made me think.

4.      This made me cry/laugh/giggle/get angry…Is that what you intended?

5.      Never thought of it like that.

6.      Oh, oh - had to read this 3 times – maybe change order/add/delete/use different words for clarity.

7.      Lost me here. Not sure what you are trying to say.

8.      I understand this to mean XYZ – is that what you intended?

9.      From what you said earlier in the story, I thought she had blue eyes?

10.  I underline issues and structures I’m sure you’re going to address in your re-write.

Here’s a comment I received. “Your world and people are slick. There’s a lot of sliding between the trees, slipping around a corner, sliding onto a bench, slipping through the doorway. Is there an atmosphere you are trying to portrait? If not, you might want to check on the frequency of these words.”

It made me laugh and it was easy for me to accept the comment and fix the word use.

Beta Readers or editors, devise a system that is both supportive and educational. Use our method if you like. Writers offer this list with your manuscript when you ask for feedback from volunteers. It will help your readers to give you the information you need without worrying about upsetting you. You are more likely to get an honest and helpful critique.

Writers helping writers—be kind to one another.

The Royal Escape from Brighton by Rosemary Morris

For more information about Rosemary's books please click on the cover above.


The Royal Escape from Brighton

The town in which my next Classical Regency Romance, Saturday’s Child is set

Today, visitors flock to Brighton to visit George IV’s Royal Pavilion, to shop in The Lanes as well as enjoying everything else the vibrant seaside town has to offer. Less well known are the events which took place there during the English Civil War when family loyalties either to the Crown or Commonwealth split them apart.

Bodiam Castle was damaged by Commonwealth soldiers who also destroyed Arundel Castle. Without any prominent Royalists in the area it seems most landlubbers, fishermen and their families favoured the Commonwealth. Nevertheless, some landowners and well-to-do traders supported Charles II.

After Commonwealth troops defeated the royalist army at the Battle of Worcester on the third of September 1651, except for Lord Wilmot, Charles II dismissed his followers. The distinctive two yards tall, dark complexioned king was hunted but always managed to escape. Once he hid high up in an oak tree while soldiers search for him beneath it. Elsewhere the king was sometimes recognised but not betrayed. If he had been caught, he would have become a pawn or, maybe, like his father Charles I, have been beheaded.

On the thirteenth of October the king set out for Brighthelmstone, Brighton’s previous name, where Wilmot had been in contact with Colonel Gunter, the king’s loyal supporter. On the fourteenth his majesty was accommodated in the George Inn, and Gunter paid a merchant sixty pieces of silver to transport two illegal duellists, aka the king and Wilmot, across the English Channel to France. However, when Tattersall, the captain of the brig, met the king he recognised him but remained silent until they were alone, when he knelt and kissed the royal hand.

On the brink of departure from Shoreham, the king spent the night at Bramber a small village. There, after six weeks during which he hid in priest’s holes, slept on pallets on the floor and endured danger and discomfort, he almost encountered Commonwealth soldiers.

I can only imagine Charles II’s profound relief when he reached Shoreham harbour in time to board the brig and at 4 a.m. on the fifteenth of October and departed. Almost ten years later he returned to England where he succeeded to the throne.

Classical Historical Fiction by Rosemary Morris

Early 18th Century novels: Tangled Love, Far Beyond Rubies, The Captain and The Countess

Regency Novels False Pretences.

Heroines Born on Different Days of the Week Books One to Six, Sunday’s Child, Monday’s Child, Tuesday’s Child, Wednesday’s Child, Thursday’s Child and Friday’s Child.

(The novels in the series are not dependent on each other, although events in previous novels are referred to and characters reappear.)

Mediaeval Novel Yvonne Lady of Cassio. The Lovages of Cassio Book One

www.rosemarymorris.co.uk

http://bookswelove.net/authors/morris-rosemary

Mysterious Green Children by Katherine Pym

 

Buy Here, A Story for All Ages

 ~*~*~*~

Sign outside of Woolpit, Sussex

I once saw a BBC production where a village nurse found several children—brothers and sisters—alone in a house located at the edge of town. Their parents were nowhere to be seen. They were desperate and hungry, and all of them had orange skin. This stumped the nurse, until she realized they ate carrots for sustenance.

Recently, I ran across an account of a 12^th century mystery yet to be resolved. A young brother and sister appeared without explanation or reason in the hamlet of Woolpit in East Anglia, during the reign of King Stephen. They wore clothing of unknown origin and spoke a foreign language. The most peculiar difference: their skin was green.

No one knows where they truly came from. It is all very ‘unearthly’. 

Two chroniclers tell the tale: 

William of Newburgh, 12^th century, who enjoyed chronicling the kings of England. While writing of King Stephen, he threw in a paragraph or two of green children.

From his manuscript, ‘…four or five miles from the noble monastery of the blessed king and martyr, Edmund; near this place are seen some very ancient cavities, called “Wolfpittes,” that is, in English, “Pits for wolves,”’ (Hence Woolpit). …‘During harvest, while the reapers were employed in gathering in the produce of the fields, two children, a boy and a girl, completely green in their persons, and clad in garments of a strange color, and unknown materials, emerged from these excavations.’ (wolf pits)

The story goes on to say the harvesters took the children to the village, but they would not eat anything put before them, until at one point beans were brought in from the field. The children, who were starving, grabbed the stalks, but there were no beans. The villagers handed the children bean pods and they ate ravenously. They refused all other foods until months later, they tried bread. As the children became accustomed to other foods, their green color diminished. They learned English, and were baptized.

Asked where they had come from, they replied, ‘”We are inhabitants of the land of St. Martin, who is regarded with peculiar veneration in the country which gave us birth.” Being further asked where that land was, and how they came thence hither, they answered, “We are ignorant of both those circumstances; we only remember this, that on a certain day, when we were feeding our father’s flocks in the fields, we heard a great sound,”’ which they likened to the chimes of bells. They had become entranced and somehow found themselves in the Woolpit fields.

Lost Children

The children were asked if people of their land believed in Christ, and were there churches. They replied, ‘”The sun does not rise upon our countrymen; our land is little cheered by its beams; we are contented with that twilight, which among you, precedes the sunrise, or follows the sunset. Moreover, a certain luminous country is seen, not far distant from ours, and divided from it by a very considerable river.”’

The other chronicler, Ralph of Coggeshall, wrote of the green children in the 13^th century. His account seems to be separate from Newburgh’s, and came from the man who looked after the children. According to Coggeshall, the children were lost chasing their father’s cattle. They sought refuge in a cave, but hearing the sound of bells, followed the chimes to Woolpit.

The boy died not long after their baptism, but the girl grew to adulthood where one source says she married a man from King’s Lynn in Norfolk, and another that she married an ambassador of King Henry II. Some said the girl, whom they called Agnes, never acted like the ladies of the area. She was always different.

How the children came to Woolpit is a mystery. If they had come from the sea, how did they find the village, which is 18.6 miles from Ipswich, 37.2 miles from Aldeburgh, and 38.2 miles from Dunwich. That’s a good ways on foot, even today. These children were very young. How could they have traveled this far alone?

Imagine Little Green Girl

The girl mentioned a river, but there is no river in the direct vicinity of Woolpit. One source says there is/was a river not far from Bury St. Edmunds. There is a River Lark near Fornham St. Martin. Are there caves nearby? Where would the children have come from where there is no direct sunlight, and everyone’s skin is green?

Explanations:

One is that the children suffered from arsenic poisoning. Another, hypochromic anemia (chlorosis), which is an iron deficiency, and would have made their skin green. Yet another theory postulates they were the children of Flemish immigrants who were persecuted and killed—possibly in the battle at Fornham in 1173. But how did the children escape a battle? Why would they even be allowed near a battle?

Why was their skin green? Did they wander the fields, eating beans until found?

I do not know. It is a mystery, not so much that the children ate beans to survive, but that the land they had come from was always in a dull murk. Where would that place be?

~*~*~*~

Thanks to:

William of Newburgh, The History of English Affairs or Historia rerum Anglicarum, A history of England from 1066 to 1198, The Great Library Collection by R.P. Pryne, Philadelphia, PA, 2015 & a reprint from original publication of AD 1220.

Who were the Green Children of Woolpit? https://www.quora.com/Who-were-the-Green-Children-of-Woolpit-2/answer/Spencer-Alexander-McDaniel

https://www.ancient-origins.net/unexplained-phenomena/green-children-woolpit-12th-century-legend-visitors-another-world-002347

http://mentalfloss.com/article/62878/mystery-green-children-woolpit