Have you ever wondered how Valentine's Day got started? First of all, the full name of the holiday is Saint Valentine's Day, but unlike Patrick, the 'Saint' part is usually dropped, possibly due to the fact that it doesn't have much to do with the real Saint Valentine, a late third century Christian martyr. He was beheaded on February 14th and that is his feast day according to the Church calendar. There are several legends about Saint Valentine which purport to explain his attachment to the holiday that bears his name, but they are most likely apochryphal. Nonetheless, they are probably the reason the holiday is named for him.
Valentine's Day seems to have been first mentioned in the Middle Ages in the writings of Chaucer, possibly the first 'love poet', particularly in his poem, The Parliment of Fowls, where he indicates that Saint Valentine's Day is an annual occurrence as a day for birds to choose their mates. Some scholars believe that Chaucer was the originator of Valentine's Day being a day of romance. By referring to Valentine's Day in poems suggestive of courtly love and associating it with nature, romance, and lovebirds, Chaucer helped to create the notion of Valentine's Day as a day set aside to celebrate romantic love.
Not long after publication of The Parliment of Fowls, other poets began referencing Valentine's Day in their work. John Lydgate, a monk and poet who was a contemporary of Chaucer and friend of his son, was likely the first person to use the word 'valentine' to designate a type of poem. The variety of uses for the word 'valentine' continues today in that a valentine can be a card (I received a valentine), a poem (I wrote a valentine), or a person (Be my valentine).
Frenchman, Charles d'Orleans (Charles , Duke of Orleans) is reputed to have been the first to send a love poem or letter to someone in observation of Valentine's Day in 1416, calling his wife, Bonne d'Armagnac "my very gentle valentine." He was imprisoned after having been captured by the British in the Hundred Years War at the time. His captor was married to Chaucer's granddaughter and he was known to have read Chaucer during his captivity.
Women sent valentine's in the Middle Ages, too. The first known English language valentine was written in 1477 by Margery Brews to John Paston of Norfolk England. In it she addressed John as "my right well-beloved Valentine." Not long after, the couple were married.
Because Chaucer and others connected Saint Valentine's feast day with the mating of birds and romance among people, many tried to find connections between the saint and romantic love, hence the legends such as Saint Valentine performing secret Christian weddings during a time of persecutions throughout the Roman Empire. However, these legends are most likely false.
As time went on the popularity of Valentine's Day waxed and waned. During times of popularity over the following centuries, it became a day for gift giving, banquets, and parties among the aristocracy and rituals involving matchmaking and divination of future mates among other classes. But no matter what other traditions grew up around it, the act of exchanging written sentiments of love and affection remained central, evolving from hand-written verses to homemade cards to commercially made cards. The giving of flowers and candy soon followed.
In America, the popularity of Valentine's Day soared in the 1840s. Previously, it was generally known as a European custom not much recognized in the States. The holiday's new-found popularity stemmed from the commercially produced Valentine's Day cards made in England beginning in the 1820s. Over the next few decades Valentine's Day cards would become a craze in England and by the 1840s that craze had migrated to America with 15,000 cards exchanged in New York in 1843, rising to as many as 30,000 by 1847. Esther Howland of Worcester, Massachusetts, aka The Mother of the American Valentine, produced some of the first elaborate valentines in 1848 and founded the New England Valentine Company.
While the giving of Valentine's Day cards is central to the holiday and still observed today, it was done a bit differently in mid-19th century America. For one thing, a reply was expected. If a gentleman sent a card asking a lady to be his valentine, she was obliged to respond yes or no. As the transmission of valentines could take days, this ritual extended for over a week. Besides cards, printers sold pamphlets, first in England and later in America, called "Valentine Writers." These pamphlets offered various poems suitable for use by those not gifted in crafting poetry. Some pamphlets offered possible responses, as well.
The recipient of a 19th century valentine did not always know from whom it came. Often they were sent anonymously. For many, it was exciting to know they had a secret admirer. However, not every valentine held sentiments of affection. Some were funny, satirical, or downright rude in their texts and/or illustrations. A few were even sexually suggestive.
The mid-19th century was the start of the movement for women's rights. Many who were opposed, took Valentine's Day as an opportunity to reprove women who sought equal rights with men. Often these discourteous cards ended with lines such as "You will never be my Valentine." One could imagine the recipient's response being something like, "Thank goodness for that!"
When the Valentine card craze was hitting America, stationers and printers took advantage of it by advertising heavily in newspapers, creating elaborate window displays, and even sponsoring Valentine-themed activities within their shops. The appeal took off and moved from being a ritual between lovers or would-be lovers to include family and friends, especially children. Thus was born the commercialization of Valentine's Day. In fact, the success of printed, commercially made Valentine's Day cards gave rise to the greeting card business as a whole, with Christmas cards following next then cards for all other occassions. By the 1920s greeting cards of all types were common.
As we know, giving cards, flowers, candy, and other gifts on Valentine's Day is alive and well today. Like nearly every holiday, the rituals associated with it have evolved over time and will probably continue to. But however you celebrate it, I wish you all a happy Valentine's Day!
Information for this post was gleaned from America's Favorite Holidays: Candid Stories by Bruce David Forbes