As a writer
I know the power of words, and I’m constantly searching for the right words to
make my stories live.
But recently I discovered the word “feminism” has been
misunderstood. I had no idea until daughter Andrea received a rude response
after she admitted she was a feminist. Made me wonder, why has this word been
demonized?
Dictionary.com defines feminism as “advocating social,
political, legal and economic rights for women equal to those of men.”
Merriam-Webster has a similar definition.
The term feminism originated in 19 century
France, I learned. A second-wave began in the United States during the early 1960s
with Betty Friedan’s book The Feminine
Mystique.
Friedan wrote this book after talking with friends, who had
given up their careers to become housewives. These women felt unfulfilled in
their domestic roles, Friedan claimed. She blamed women’s magazines, run by men,
for encouraging women to become mothers and housewives, rather than career
women. A different scenario existed in the 1930s, when women’s magazines
featured confident and independent women with careers, according to Friedan.
More recently Harvard MBA and radio host Samantha Ettus wrote
The Pie Life to inspire working
mothers and help them let go of the guilt. All women should keep their feet in
the workplace, according to Ettus.
Regardless of what Ettus and others
have written to encourage women, I found a plethora of negative on-line comments,
misconstruing the meaning of the word feminism. Many were under the impression
that feminists were men haters, and these same folks left vile comments.
I had to stop reading these negative remarks or they would
have poisoned me. Words can poison as Japanese scientist Dr. Masaru Emoto has proven
in his experiments. Our bodies contain mostly water, and with that premise, Emoto
filled several bottles with distilled water. Then he taped words to the
bottles. When he read the words aloud, the molecules in the bottles reacted.
Emoto photographed these molecules and discovered that positive
words like “love” created beautiful formations. Negative words like “I hate
you” produced ugly, violent images. Emoto has written about his experiments in
his book The Hidden Messages in Water.
Other researchers have confirmed Emoto’s research. Words have
the power to change our lives, they say.
For example, in a Psychology Today article, authors Newburn and Waldman used several examples
to prove this theory. They mentioned an experiment by psychologists at Missouri
State University who designed an exercise for patients in pain. They asked the
patients to identify their deepest values and meditate on them. When the
patients did as instructed, they were able to reduce their pain and distress.
Everyone can do this exercise, the article said, and we can
involve our family and friends by asking: “What is your deepest personal
value?”
Before we can adequately answer this question, however, we
must relax completely, close our eyes for 60 seconds and listen for the word or
words that express our sincerest values, according to the Psychology Today article.
Words like “peace” and “love” reduce physical and emotional
stress, they discovered.
I tried this exercise several times.
Each time I came up with different words: Love, creativity, family, peace,
health/fitness, faith, determination, bliss/happiness, achievement, patience,
respect, compassion, growth, optimism, education, sincerity, abundance,
inspiration, excellence, strength, trust, justice/equality.
But getting back to the word feminism,
Andrea wanted to know if I considered myself a feminist. I told her I didn’t
like labels, but given the meaning, I had to say, “Yes.” I believe in equal
rights for everyone, and regret this word has been demonized.
When I asked daughter Rene, “Are you a feminist?” she didn’t
hesitate. “Yes, women should have the same social, economic and political
rights as men,” she said.
It pleases me to know my daughters understand the true
meaning of this word and identify with it, but others don’t apparently and need a
clarification, which is why I like what actress Martha Plimpton has said:
“I take a lot of pride in calling myself a feminist, always
have,” Plimpton wrote in an e-mail. “We’re going to have to insist on
correcting bigotry as it happens in real time. And fear of women’s equality, or
the diminishment of it, is a kind of bigotry. I think it’s important to remove
the stigma associated with women’s equality, and as such, yes, normalizing the
word ‘feminist’ and making sure people know what it means is incredibly
important…”
My latest book, A Message in the Roses, is loosely based on a
murder trial I covered in Atlanta. You may get a copy here:
To Read more about my work and life, please visit my website:
This
book is set in Lusignan, the town Melusine created according to legend.
Lusignan is also the name of the family she started in Aquitaine.
Melusine is first featured in Book 2, PAGAN QUEEN, as a child. She
reappears in Book 3 SEDUCING SIGEFROI, Book 4 LADY OF LUXEMBOURG, and
Book 5 CHATELAINE OF FOREZ.
In
Lusignan, she gives birth to a powerful family. Her descendants Guy of
Lusignan and his brother became kings of Jerusalem and Cyprus during the
Crusades. Another descendant of hers is the famous and infamous Eleanor
of Aquitaine, twice queen, and mother. King Richard mentions more than
once the stain upon his family, his evil ancestress through the
centuries, the cursed one. That was Melusine.
But
beyond the myth and the legend, I wanted to find the heart of these
characters. Remembering that history is always written by the victors,
and Paganism was crushed by Christendom. So it made sense that the
Pagans of the time would be reviled and presented in a negative light,
even accused of horrible deeds.
