God save the Queen--Tricia McGill

Find all Tricia McGill's Books We Love titles HERE

It amazes me how even today a vast majority of people are fascinated by the British Monarchy. Magazines make a lot of money publishing pictures and anecdotes of members of the Royal Family, be they British or otherwise. I, personally, am a monarchist. Arguments go on here in Australia about whether or not we should become a Republic. http://www.republic.org.au/ If it isn’t broken don’t fix it is my motto. I admire and respect Queen Elizabeth, who has done a marvelous job throughout her long reign, and I do hope she can continue until the day she passes on. Just my humble opinion.

One of my brothers met Queen Elizabeth at Portsmouth when she visited one of her Royal Navy minesweepers that he served on after WW11. His only comment I can recall was that she was tiny and had lovely skin. My eldest sister, Doris, also met Her Majesty here in Australia on one of the Queen’s early visits. I seem to recall my sister was more worried about one of the other waitresses who had the audacity to be showing an inch of her under slip. That just didn’t do in front of the Queen. Doris was introduced to the Queen, which gave her something to talk about for years.

Another monarch who has fascinated me over the years is Queen Victoria who ruled the United Kingdom of Gt Britain and Ireland from 1837 to 1901. Many authors are also intrigued by the Victorian Era, as shown by the books set in that period. Mind you, it is not so much Victoria who holds my interest as her large family. And being a romantic at heart I pictured this idyllic love affair between her and her beloved Prince Albert, and their perfect life surrounded by their many children conceived through that love.

Alas, my previous opinions concerning Queen Victoria were completely shattered recently when a programme aired on BBC TV; Queen Victoria’s Children. What a fascinating insight into that royal family.

Find details here: http://www.bbc.com/news/magazine-20782442

Or here: http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b04pgzwj  

And what an eye-opener. Far from being this devoted family, wholly content within their blissful cocoon, they were what today might be considered dysfunctional to say the least.

My heartfelt thanks to historian Jane Ridley for some of the following facts, mainly taken from her book Bertie: A Life of Edward V11, published by Chatto & Windus:
https://www.theguardian.com/books/2012/sep/14/bertie-life-edward-vii-jane-ridley-review  

Victoria and Albert’s marriage was a love match of course, but in time their picture of perfect domesticity was proved a lie. The four sons and five daughters were born due to Victoria’s insatiable infatuation for her prince. The façade shown to the world proved to be so different to the actual facts.

Because, in the 17 years of their marriage, Victoria was pregnant a lot of the time, the Prince ably took on her heavy workload. This annoyed hell out of her and they were caught in this power struggle, which caused endless rows, some shaking the walls of the palace as she stormed about slamming doors. This makes her more human to me, as my husband and I had many a door-slamming argument even though we dearly loved each other. Poor Victoria, although she loved her prince she must have been madly jealous when he made such a good job of the tasks he took on. Albert became terrified of these temper outbursts of hers and doubtless considered at times that she might have inherited the madness of George 111.

Truth was, Victoria detested being pregnant, even though she enjoyed the initial act of conceiving the babies. And over time she hated almost every one of her offspring. She brought in a wet nurse as she considered breast feeding ‘disgusting’. Her breasts were more for Albert’s pleasure than to satisfy her baby’s hunger. In her documented letters to several of her children and friends she admitted her dislike for her children. To be honest, she was a battle-axe of a mother, domineering and unlikable, never caring or soft. It seems most of them couldn’t wait to get married and away from her.

Bertie, the eldest, who later ruled as Edward V11 (and by all accounts made a not too bad job of it) was disliked, and even bullied, by both parents for his philandering ways. They both considered him a half-wit. Imagine! The story of his “fall from grace” when, while training with the army in Ireland, he smuggled a prostitute into his bed, is well known. Victoria and Albert must have been beside themselves with chagrin.

Victoria blamed Bertie for Alfred’s premature death because, after her husband visited his son at Cambridge where they took a long walk in the rain, Albert took sick. He died three weeks later, but it is probable the rain soaking had nothing to do with it. The cause of death was likely typhoid. Victoria could not bear to have Bertie near her and for the next 40 years of her life wore black as she mourned her Prince. The public saw her as a pathetic grief-stricken widow. We now know the story is very different.

In fact her pathological need to exact control of her large family caused her to send informers and spies out to report back to her on all of her offspring. I found it inconceivable to hear that after Bertie married Princess Alexandra, Victoria went so far as to get the doctor to report back on everything, even Alexandra’s menstrual cycle.

Victoria once remarked that Bertie was like her. Obviously she was right, for Bertie was highly sexed, and had a bad temper. His saving grace was that he was charming. At least he has been praised for the way, in later years, he modernized the British monarchy.

Victoria’s other sons didn’t fare much better with their mother. Dear Leopold, a hemophiliac, was described by Victoria as "a very common-looking child". What kind of mother can’t stand the looks of her son? She did her best to wrap him in a cocoon as if he was an invalid, appointing a bully of a servant to look after him. Leopold won the chance to study at Oxford after a long battle with her. He was only 30 when he died. What a miserable existence he must have endured.

The only son who was anything like his father was Arthur, later the Duke of Connaught. He was her favorite, simply because he obeyed her.

As for the girls, Vicky, the eldest daughter, couldn’t escape her mother’s interference even after she married Fritz, the heir to the throne of Prussia. Victoria wrote to her daughter almost every day, trying to manipulate their lives in Germany. And when Vicky became pregnant what did her mother say? The “horrid” news upset her dreadfully.

Thank goodness Vicky, and her sister Alice, also married to a German prince, decided to defy their mother and secretly breastfed their babies. Of course Victoria found out and was furious. I imagine all the children were scared of their mother at any given time. Because she was also their sovereign they were compelled in some way to obey her.

The youngest child Beatrice (known as Baby) was kept at home. Baby was terrified of her mother. Victoria refused to speak to her for 6 months after Beatrice told her that she had become engaged to be married to her own German Prince. Thank goodness there was one daughter with the courage to rebel. Feisty Louise refused to marry her mother’s choice, and chose Lord Lorne, the son of the Duke of Argyll instead. Sadly this proved a bad choice as it was a disastrous, unhappy marriage.

Perhaps I should not be so harsh on Victoria, for she herself was brought up by an overbearing mother who designed “The Kensington System”.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kensington_System

This consisted of a strict set of rules concerning the upbringing of the future Queen. Victoria grew to hate her mother, who was strict to the point of being brutal. Victoria also hated her mother’s lady-in-waiting Lady Flora Hastings.  Doubtless Victoria felt released from her mother’s clutches when she married her handsome Prince Albert. But then all these babies began to come along, putting a curb on her own pleasures, presumably fostering her resentment. They often say a bully breeds a bully. Hopefully this trait wasn’t passed on to her offspring. I can't help but wonder just why she didn't look more kindly on her children considering her own miserable childhood.

Queen Victoria’s letters are available in some form from most online book sellers.
Find her scrapbook here: http://www.queen-victorias-scrapbook.org/contents/3-3.html  

Visit my Web Page

Settling in Southern England

Suspense Thriller by Randall Sawka

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Click here to view and purchase BWL Author Randall Sawka's books

Settled in nicely in southern-very southern-England. We love our 2-bedroom apartment. It helps us deal with the rainy weather (who knew it rained in England : ) ). If the sky opens up I can slip away in to one of the bedrooms to write. This allows Nancy to use the living area and kitchen without causing distractions. When the weather breaks, as it did today I dashed off to a local pub to scribble away. Yes, I'm having coffee and water. Keeps the brain going.

That's not to say I don't take days off. We found ourselves at a massive tank museum just outside of Weymouth. It was amazing. Dozens and dozens of tanks from the first to the latest. Even found ourselves beside the tank used by Brad Pitt in "Fury." The museum lent it to them and kept it in the exact condition from the movie for the time being. Thank you Andy for the private tour!







The cool sea air has been invigorating. I'm writing at a record pace. Very fulfilling. Today we will sort out the final six weeks of our year-long, around-the-world adventure. Looks like Malta and France. Ah, but that's for next months blog.

Randall

What's in DK Davis' Writer's Tool Shed?

Hello everyone. Welcome to Books We Love Blog. Please settle in, grab that cup of coffee, hot chocolate, or tea and join me as I share what’s in my writer’s tool shed with you. Please feel comfortable asking questions or leaving comments as I’ll respond to every one of them.   

I’m DK Davis, a new author to the Books We Love family. I pen young adult supernatural, sci-fi adventures with varying degrees of romance.  My first book, Secret: In Wolf Lake is the first in the Secret Series, published January 1^st, 2017. An excellent way to kick off the New Year; )

I live in Southwest Michigan with two nine-year-old cats who own me (Izzy and Crocks), and a sassy ten-year-old Sheltie (Dusty) who does his best to herd them, along with me and my husband too…or anyone who enters our home. He’s definitely a bark-aholic and not afraid to tell you so. LOL

It’s so nice to meet you...and now on to what brought you to this post… 

A Writer’s Tool Shed

What does that even mean? Laptop? Pens? Notebooks? Websites? Links? Books on the Craft?

NOPE, none of the above. Well, I do have all of those things…just like every author does, but what I’m referring to as my “tools” is something more specific to me.

Every author has their own system/process of writing. What works best to stay in the flow, that forward trajectory, driving them around the final lap called “the end” of a story.

Don’t we as writers want that for ourselves – anything that speeds things along for us?

Now, I own a shed with writing tools that keep me on track, help me to eliminate “most” struggles or obstacles before they paralyze my progress.

My Tools of the Trade

• Character Sketches: a complete biography of the main story-stars including the villain. The biggy here is to list any trauma or shattering moment that changes/shifts the story-star’s perception. Use a lesser degree for secondary story-stars. (check out Screenplay: The Foundations of Screenwriting by Syd Field, amazing book for fiction novels also)
•   Plotting: Index cards (14 beginning, 28 middle, 14 ending = 56 cards) also given in great detail in Syd’s book. It’s a line-up of events, plan of action that keeps me moving forward, although sometimes the characters change those events, my momentum and drive remains until the end. Plus this story lay-out doesn’t take very long to do once you get started with the brain storms.
•             Timeline: Writing this as I finish each chapter. Listing the day and also time (if relevant) of the characters story, word count, page numbers, and highlights/events of each chapter. It is a godsend when referencing back to a scene or dialogue or event as I’m writing.
• Research Notations: Rather than doing all the research before I start my book (I can spend a ton of time doing unnecessary research for the sake of having “everything” before I start that first chapter – talk about a procrastinator) I use the “Review” comment tool to make notes throughout my story as I’m writing. That way I know specifically what to research and where it needs to go after the story is completed.

I’m still honing my story-writing skills, and my tools may change or I might add more of them…but for now, I’m totally impressed in all of them listed here – they sharpen my process, speed things up, and I love all of them for that; )

Thank you all for stopping in, hope you found this post helpful. If you have a tool in your writer’s toolbox that you’d like to share, I’d love to hear about it. Please leave a comment; I can always add another tool to my arsenal.

Secret Series:

A series of secrets, invisible yet glaring, and most include a Supernatural spin, like an unwelcomed sensation sparking every nerve ending. 

Secret: In Wolf Lake:

Samantha’s dealing with a lot of emotional blow-back from her mother’s new marriage. Then she discovers a gifted creature living in Wolf Lake, and life suddenly becomes all about keeping his existence a secret, earning his trust. That is until his life depends on her saving him. But she won’t be able to do it alone…

You can find DK Davis here:

Twitter – https://twitter.com/DKDavisBooks

FB – https://www.facebook.com/dk.davis.92    

Website – http://suda788.wixsite.com/dkdavis

Books We Love Ltd. Author Page – http://www.bookswelove.com/authors/davis-dk/

Amazon Author Page – https://www.amazon.com/DK-Davis/e/B01MT5VDZV

Amazon Link: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01N7O41FM

Voices by Victoria Chatham

NOW AVAILABLE FROM YOUR FAVORITE ONLINE RETAILER

We have a new member of our family. A kitten acquired as a companion for our resident cat who was sad and lonely after his next-door cat buddies moved away. Uh-oh, you’re thinking, crazy cat lady here. Well, crazy possibly; cat lady, slowly getting there after being a life-long dog-lover.

I'd always known my dogs' voices. Like with my kids, they had their distinctive sounds which I could determine three fields away but I somehow never expected a cat to be so vocal. I’d had cats in the past, briefly as it turned out because moving cars can’t stop in time for them if the driver even cared to. I simply don’t remember their voices, but our Number One cat objected vociferously to the newcomer, going from the deepest, base growl deep in his chest to a continual and very disapproving ‘yuuuuaaaakkkk'. Imagine having something tacky on your tongue and try vocalizing it. Yep, just like that.

The kitten, on the other hand, has a squeaky little meow that sounds like a rusty hinge. She sometimes chirrups and mutters to herself with a soft ‘ft-ft-ft’ sound. At other times, mostly when secured in her cat carrier, it makes you wonder how a one-and-a-bit-pound kitten can make such a racket.

Voice is such an individual expression, whether it is cats, dogs, or kids. The guy on the corner is going to sound different to a movie actor, and look at the number of those who are now lending their voices to animated characters. Movie buffs know those voices. They are instantly recognizable. Maybe the actor’s name doesn’t immediately spring to mind, but the voice resonates with you. Most recently Dwayne Johnson (The Rock) and Matthew McConaughey have voice-starred in Moana and Sing. Last summer Ellen Degeneres was Dory, and who can forget Eddie Murphy as Donkey in the Shrek series?

So it is with authors. Each has a different voice. Unlike cats, dogs, kids and movie stars, authors’ voices develop over time. We may start out writing like our favorite author. Mine was Georgette Heyer, which brought me to writing Regency romance. However, I so enjoyed contemporary author Maeve Binchy that I couldn’t bring myself to write in that genre. How could I write like Maeve if I was not her? Go figure.

It is only in the constant practice of writing that an author develops their voice, their personal way of stringing words together. They may listen to the nuances of emotion in their minds when they write dialogue and transfer it to the page, or picture their favorite colors when describing a view or setting. They may have a particular take on life because of their origins, but none of this will be immediate when they first start writing.

There may be several false starts before a writer becomes aware of the choices they are making in their word usage. The wider a writer’s vocabulary, the more choice they have and will sound more authentic. When I read a word I don’t know, I make sure to look it up in my dictionary. I may never use it, but at least I’m expanding my vocabulary. Hiding behind common-or-garden phraseology may tell a story, but it will not have any impact. One author described voice to me as ‘having the confidence to bleed on the page’.

The world around us, our family and friends, our experience of life influences us in ways that we don’t always appreciate. I might think of our resident cat’s growl when my Alpha Male hero faces the villain or our kitten’s ‘ft-ft-ft’ when I describe my heroine having something of a hissy fit with her nose in the air.

It has taken me many years of constant writing practice to achieve the confidence I now have to ‘bleed on the page’, to have confidence in my writing and my essential voice.

Find me at:

 http://bookswelove.net/authors/chatham-victoria/

www.facebook.com/AuthorVictoriaChatham

http://victoriachatham.blogspot.ca

A Pink Smartie For My Sister

A Pink Smartie For My Sister

Click here for more about Frank Talaber's books from Books We Love

I was born in Beaverlodge, Alberta. I’ve never been there, but they tell me it’s nice. Well, I mean I left when I was two and moved Edmonton, Alberta. Okay, let’s make this clear, my parents left and I was taken with them. I wanted to stay behind, but the powers that be wouldn’t hear of it. The only thing I know about the town is that my older sister, Judy, is buried there. She had pneumonia when she was two and died. My mom told me that when I was two I also got pneumonia and was deathly ill. She got on her knees one night and prayed, “Dear God, let him live and I’ll take as many kids as you can give me.”

She did say after six more she should have put a limit on that promise.

My favorite playground as I grew up was the Beverly waste oil pit and dump, before it was covered over and turned into the golf course. I dread to think of all of those thousands of tons of oil when they come seeping into the river someday. Man, the stuff we used to find in that dump. A storehouse of wonder for young boys. I bet there’s a lot great great great grandparent seagulls that still to this day tell the youngsters of all the grand feasts they used to have there and now all they get to snack on are inedible white balls.

I’ve been asked what makes me so determined to never give up. One of the most profound things that ever happened to me was when I was about fourteen or so, my second father died of cancer. He was the heart throb of my mom’s life. She never remarried and as far as I remember only ever went on one or two dates after. She tried to commit suicide, shortly after his death, she couldn’t continue living life without him. At that age I would have been the dad of six younger siblings.

I made it my resolve to never give up. After 398 rejections I finally got my first novel published and this spring I’ve got the fourth being released.

The motto of this story is I never, never eat pink Smarties. I’ve got all the pink Smarties, I’ve never ate on my desk. Well, it’s only one, but I was more of a M-and-M fan most of my life. And it’s actually a brown Smartie spray painted pink. But there’s no website devoted to brown ones so I painted it pink one day. Don’t believe me go to this website.

http://www.zutroy.com/stuff/pinksmartie.php

You think if people wanted to get married over pink ones and worship them, then you just can’t go eating them willy-nilly.  So, I’ve got another book to write, but before I go my intentions are to lay that pink Smartie on my sister’s gravesite in Beaverlodge one day and say “hi, saved something special for you.” I think she’d like that.

Sincerely

Frank Talaber

twosoulmates@shaw.ca

Frank Talaber’s Writing Style? He usually responds with: Mix Dan Millman (Way of The Peaceful Warrior) with Charles De Lint (Moonheart) and throw in a mad scattering of Tom Robbins (Even Cowgirls Get The Blues).
PS: He’s better looking than Stephen King (Carrie, The Stand, It, The Shining) and his romantic stuff will have you gasping quicker than Robert James Waller (Bridges Of Madison County).

Or as is often said: You don’t have to be mad to be a writer, but it sure helps.

Writer by soul. Words born within. 

Karma the seed. Paper the medium.  

Pen the muse. Novels the fire.

http://twosoulmates.wix.com/frankt-author-blog

http://www.bookswelove.net/authors/talaber-frank/

https://www.facebook.com/Frank-Talaber-805296946204873/

Twitter: @FrankTalaber

Click here to purchase Frank Talaber's books from Books We Love

Coming in February 2017, Thunderbird's Wake

 A penitentiary is a dangerous place and into the world of the criminal enters a saint. Well, bearing rattles and guardian beasts, the native born find him a saint. To the rest he's more nuts than a squirrels winter stash. There's a god asleep, awakening. Humans that seek justice and a sprite that needs justice from humanity.

So what makes you want to break into one? You can ask Charlie, but he ain't telling. And if he did you wouldn't believe it in a dozen lifetimes. Come enter, the madness this spring

Endorsements for the upcoming Book

There are many aspects true to First Nation’s beliefs. For example the transformation of animals and anomalies within our realm. Frank Talaber’s writing is clear and concise, leaving no grey areas. But his true talent as a writer is not only a sense of time, history and capturing First Nation’s humor, but going from the real to the surreal and the supernatural. A gift he plies very well.

Tom Patterson

Nuu-Cha-Nulth Artist and Master Carver

Just when I was beginning to wonder where the next great Canadian story teller would emerge from, Frank Talaber has written a modern crime mystery with a twist. In “Thunderbird’s Wake” Talaber weaves the richness of Canada’s west coast aboriginal spirituality into the science of modern forensics. CSI comes to Haida Gwaii as the shaman and the detective conduct an investigation that will take them and the reader on a journey to a place where murder, redemption and ancient mysticism intersect.

Michael G de Jong, QC

Minister of Finance, Government House Leader,

Province of British Columbia

New Releases at Books We Love

TO PURCHASE CLICK HERE

 

Vijaya Schartz's final book in the Curse of the Lost Isle series, Angel of Lusignan (Book 8) has just been released.  This is an amazing book that caps off a truly wonderful series.  If you're a medieval romance and fantasy lover, you are going to love these books.

For more about all of the books in the Curse of the Lost Isle series (including a set of the first 4 books in the series) and links to purchase, check them out at Vijaya's Books We Love author page.

Young knight Raymond of Forez, blaming himself for his uncle's death in a hunting accident, falls off his horse at the very sight of the lovely Melusine. He has no knowledge of their turbulent past. Even less that she is an immortal Fae with angel blood... afflicted by a curse. He doesn’t believe in the local legends... yet how can he resist such beauty and loving wisdom?

Melusine, who waited for him in Aquitaine, is full of remembered love. But can she trust this young knight with her mission, or her deadly secrets? In this explosive religious climate, the Church is suspicious of everyone, and the slightest rumor of witchery or Pagan magic could send them both burning at the stake. Can their love overcome the curse this time?

Nosy Neighbors

BOOKS WE LOVE AUTHOR J.Q. ROSE

 

Hello and welcome to the Books We Love Insider Blog!

Because I'm a writer, I have a good excuse to use my imagination to make up stories with quirky characters and interesting settings. In keeping with the humor in my latest cozy mystery, Dangerous Sanctuary, I thought we'd have some fun imagining a conversation with the main character, Pastor Christine Hobbs, and her Nosy Neighbor. 

You know how nearly everyone has a nosy neighbor in the neighborhood. Well, the pastor’s neighbor called her to find out about the murder at Pastor Christine’s church. Realizing the neighbor’s right to be concerned since she lives so near the church and parsonage, Christine took time to answer her questions. Perhaps they’re some of the same questions you may have about this romantic suspense, Dangerous Sanctuary.

Phone Conversation between Pastor Christine and her Nosy Neighbor

Nosy Neighbor: Oh, Pastor, what in the world happened over at Dayspring Church? Ambulance, fire engines, police were over there on Thursday morning.

Pastor Christine: Oh dear. I bet you were scared when you saw all the emergency units here at the church. I’m sorry I didn’t call you. It’s been pretty crazy around here.

Unfortunately our talented Director of Music, William White, was found dead in our church basement.  We’re trying to deal with his loss as best we can. We’re having a difficult time imagining anyone would murder this kind young man.

Detective Cole Stephens considers our custodian, Dutch, and myself to be “persons of interest.”  Perhaps you saw something from your window that morning that could help the police with the investigation?

NN: Oh, no Pastor. I didn’t see anything till the emergency vehicles arrived.  I must admit I did see the story on the news and in the newspapers. It’s so ridiculous how the stations play the story over and over 24 hours a day. But what is crazier is to accuse you and that gentle custodian of murder. I’m so sorry this has happened at your church.

PC: Thank you.

NN: Can you tell me how you came to minister to the people at Dayspring Church? I mean they’ve NEVER had a female pastor in all the years I’ve lived next door.

PC:  I love being the spiritual leader of the folks at Dayspring. I’ve been there about a year now, but I’ve been in the pulpit for five years at another church. I was happy to move away from that area, not because I had problems at the other church, but because I could put distance between my ex-husband, Brad, and me.

I’m having a terrific experience getting to know so many wonderful people at Dayspring. We’re becoming a family. Of course, there are always conflicts that arise when dealing with so many personalities. The president of the women’s group, Mrs. Jewell is not exactly happy that I’m caring for a pig and kangaroo in the back yard of the church parsonage and that I’ve taken in Mrs. Whitcomb’s cat after that sweet lady passed. I’m looking for a family who wants the darling tabby cat. Bitsy is litter trained and I have re-assured the parsonage committee that Bitsy has not had any accidents on the church-owned parsonage floors. Say, you wouldn’t consider taking in this adorable cat, would you?

NN:  Oh no, Pastor. I’m very allergic to cats. I was wondering about the animals in your back yard though.

PC: Well, yes. Now the backyard is another story…you know pigs like to root up the ground and eat everything in sight. I keep telling President Jewell that their stay just temporary, and I’ll replace all the bushes, trees, flowers, and grass when their owner re-claims the animals.

NN: How much longer will they be there for heaven’s sake? Of course, they aren’t bothering me, but Wilda just a few doors down from the parsonage is worried that pig is going to get loose and root up her yard! And, uh, I’m sure she’s also concerned the pig might get in the road and get run over.

PC: Of course, she’s concerned about the pig getting hurt…Please assure her the animals will be gone as soon as their owner is healthy again. She’s in the hospital. And, well it’s a long story how I ended up with Abraham the pig and Katy the kangaroo in the back yard.

NN: I often see the flower shop’s delivery truck at the church and in your driveway. You know, I just notice when I’m outside walking. I’m not watching out the window at your comings and goings, of course.

PC: That would be my friend Lacey, the gal who owns the flower shop.  She’s the petite strawberry blonde. We tease each other about our difference in height because I’m six feet tall.  With the weddings and funerals, she’s always delivering flowers to the church, so we have time to talk and get to know each other.

 NN: You know, I have a very tall nephew who’s divorced. He’s a sweet guy and after awhile, you don’t notice his big ears or his lisp. Can you date being a minister?

PC: Well, yes I can. I’m not a monk. I’m a real person who likes to enjoy a movie, and a beer and pizza with my friends. Thank you so much for wanting to introduce me to your nephew, but I’m just not ready to date anyone yet.

NN: Not even thinking about that cute Detective Stephens? I’ve seen him going into the church and parsonage—a lot!

PC: Strictly for the murder investigation. Why would I be interested in a man who wants to put me in jail for murder?

NN: Why, of course not. I’m sorry I asked, but he IS around a lot and I just thought…

PC: Hey, look at the time. I’m almost late for a meeting at the church. Good talking to you. I’ve got to run. Good-bye.

NN: Okay. Well, I’ll bring my nephew over when he stops in again. Uh, hello….hello. Are you there???

# # # #

Author J.Q. Rose

Connect with J.Q. Rose online at

J.Q.Rose blog 

Facebook 

Google+ 

J.Q.  Rose Amazon Author Page 

Spatchcocked! by Stuart R. West

My wife told me she wants to "spatchcock" a turkey. After my initial giggle-fit ended, she explained that spatchcocking's a method of cooking poultry by cutting out the backbone and flattening the carcass. It's supposed to cook more evenly. Or something equally gross.

Spatchcock Monthly July Cover Model

That doesn't matter. What does matter is I've found a fabulous new word. I'd like to "trend" the word. I wanna' make it rain with spatchcockery.

Spatchcock. Everyone take a minute and say it out loud. I'll wait. Done? It's fun to say, isn't it? Rolls right off the tongue. Kinda' cathartic, too. Violent sounding without the physical fall-out. And wonderfully, subtly vulgar; it makes the twelve-year-old boy in me laugh.

But the word can be used in many more creative ways. The next time someone gets on your nerves? Try this: "Are you looking to get spatchcocked?" Or how about this? "Looks like I've stepped in a deep pile of spatchcock." Or "I'm gonna' spatchcock this yard with my rake." See what I mean? A multifaceted word, guaranteed hours of fun.

A painful looking display of human spatchcockery.

Where in the world did this awesome word come from? Mr. Wikipedia wasn't much help, nor Ms. Google. I wonder if some guy went postal on his turkey, ripped out the backbone in a fit of cooking rage, and screamed, "I'll dispatch you yet!"

Or maybe some chef was embarrassingly named "Spatchcock," an unfortunate footnote in cooking history.

But, as I said, none of that matters. Please use this term, incorporate it into your daily vocabulary. Then sit back and enjoy the fun.

I'll update once (if?) my wife and I ever end up spatchcocking a turkey.
 
Intentional spatchcockery--akin to "Hitchcockery"--abounds in my cozy, (I hope) amusing mystery books: the Zach and Zora comic mystery series. Don't take my word for it. I wouldn't. Click on the covers for free samples:

A Peek at my Office by Nancy M Bell

A Longview Wedding is the third book in my A Longview Romance series. Cale and Michelle finally get things to go their way. Available at all good book sellers. Click on the image to see my BWL author page and all my books.

I thought it would be fun to let you all see where I work and create. It's a bit crowded, okay, more than a bit. But it has a big window and three antique book cases. The book cases are stuffed with research books, antique books, series of books I collect by my favourite authors. Charles de Lint, Mercedes Lackey, Anne McCaffrey, Patrick Taylor, Jack Whyte and Diana Gabaldon. To name a few...LOL

The middle of the bookcase that takes up the whole west wall of my office. You can see some of my Beswick horse collection.

A rest of the bookcase that takes up the whole wall, jam packed with books. This is where I keep the copies of my own books. The picture at the end of the case is of Nanjizal in Cornwall. The split in the rock is called the Song of the Sea. The bay is also known as Mill Bay. This location is featured in my Cornwall Adventures book Go Gently.

The wall by office door. The white horse is White Spirit an Alberta Wildie stallion living on Crown Land up near Sundre, Alberta. Below him, the picture is 'moose hair tufting'. First Nations artists create these by pulling moose hair through in a pattern and then cutting and shaping the hair to create original and lovely pieces of art. Some are coloured with natural dyes while some like this one are left the natural colour.

The bookcase and desk combo, lots of my crystals, hawk feathers from the pair that nest over the road from me, and some treasured books.

The bookcase on the south wall in front of the big window with my pretty peacock Tiffany lamp on top. This is the case with most of research books hide.

The wall above the long bookcase with the tapestry of the Battle of Bruges. A gift from a friend of mine. The small framed piece beside the tapestry is an example of 'birch biting'. It is a dying First Nations art created by folding white birch bark and marking the bark with a pattern by biting with the incisor teeth. I first saw this in Flin Flon, Manitoba and bought a small piece. It is lovely and all are one of a kind.

Prints on the wall to the left of the door.



As you can tell the place is pretty crowded but I have all my research books and information at my fingertips. Okay, that's a bit of an exaggeration. Usually, I'm sifting through my books and moving stuff so I can get the cabinet doors all the way open. It's a great environment for creating my stories. The dogs sleep on the floor in the doorway, and my big white cat likes to sleep on my comfy chair.

I hope you've enjoyed this small tour of my work area.

The Ladies With The Blue Hair - Janet Lane Walters

About 70 years ago, I was 10 years old and I noticed the lady across the street had blue hair. This puzzled me and I wondered why. She was a lady who had a gardener to care for her yard. When she went places, a man drove a shiny car to take her places. She didn't ride the streetcar or the train that stopped not far from where we lived. How did her hair become blue? This fascinated me and I believed that to become a lady one had to have hair this color.





Then one morning I noticed my mother added this blue stuff to the white clothes she was washing. Was this the answer? I imagined this was the source of the hair.


Then I began to see other women with blue hair. These were also women who wore nice clothes, had nice jewelry and arrived at church wearing hats and gloves. Perhaps this was the answer. Maybe blue hair ran in their families. My grandmother had gray hair but hers wasn't blue.


This puzzled me for years. Then I met my husband and mentioned the ladies with the blue hair. He nodded. He had noticed blue hair on some women where he lived. He also had no idea how their hair became blue. He did say they were ladies and wore nice clothes and were women of importance in his town.


Aha, I thought. He finished medical school and we moved to a large town in Western Pennsylvania, not that far from where we had grown up. I joined the Women's Medical Wives group and I noticed there were women with blue hair. They always wore hats and gloves to the meetings. Maybe, just maybe I had found the answer. They were ladies and maybe I could become one.


Now, I was a jeans kind of person but I did have a pair of gloves, or thought I had. I went to the meeting in my jeans and a velvet tunic top. I wore my fancy boots bought when we lived in Texas but I could only find one glove. An elbow one left from some party I'd had to attend. I went to the meeting and walked in. To add to the looks I always received since I had no intention of wearing a little black dress, pearls, a hat and gloves, I pulled off the glove.


"I couldn't find the other," I announced.


I did not ever discover how all those years ago those ladies had learned how to blue their gray hair. But that led to other outrageous actions - like how I celebrated my 35th birthday. Perhaps I'll tell you that tale some day.


Oh, by the way, I now have a streak of blue in my hair. Not a lot but then I'm not a lady.