Marketing, thy name is Satan!

 

Vanessa C. Hawkins Author Page

If you look up the word Marketing in the dictionary you may come across something like this...

MARKETING verb 1. ♦ frustration, vexation, agitation; Marketing is the biggest pain in the ass and writing a book is a thousand times easier and why!? Why did I ever think I could market my book? God help me, please! PLEASE! 2. ♦ the Devil; Marketing is the Devil.

Just in case you failed to understand the definition, here is a visual. 

While it's true that many writers are humble scribes furiously scribbling their fancies on paper, when it comes to becoming a... duh duh duh! author, most of us don't know shite about putting ourselves out  

there. In fact, once we get over the initial excitement of being offered a contract by a publisher, many of us succumb to the crushing weight of what will happen once our book is out amongst the public. What do I do? Book launch? I have to read IN FRONT of people?

Well yes. You should. But Especially during Covid times it is not always easy. 

Social Media, book store signings, readings, writing press releases, online virtual author meet and greets, and book tours are all great, right? BUT... they also lean towards the boisterous signs of an extrovert. 

Now I'm not saying that all writers are introverted creep-a-zoids who stay isolated in their rooms for hours on end writing about characters they've thought up in their heads to put them in silly, cruel and oftentimes weird situations but... I also don't know how to finish that sentence.

Just because Stephen King resembles a goblin doesn't mean he's weird... right?

But really, no. Not all authors are introverted. Are a lot of them? Yes. Do some bear an uncanny resemblance to goblins? Maybe. But you shouldn't judge a book by it's cover... even though we totally do. I talked about it actually last month.

My point being: marketing is hard. A lot of authors struggle with it. Sure, anyone can put a book up on the internet, but how do you stand out among thousands of other authors trying to survive and eke out a living in an Amazonian wilderness? 

Well... good question! And honestly... I don't really know! If I did, I'd probably be doing something else, like sipping martini's and eating ice cream sundaes made with edible golf leaf and caviar, topped with a unicorn horn or chocolate dragon claws or something.

Mmm... edible dragon horn...  

But despite that, my book A Curious Case of Simon Todd, was featured in a Bookbub recently, and if you don't know what Bookbub is, it's a platform where authors can apply to feature their books on their site for a fee. Now getting a Bookbub deal isn't easy. I applied more times than Bart said Ay Caramba in the first six seasons of The Simpsons. But when I did get a deal, it was a great experience! I sold over 500 books on Amazon alone and made more than my fee cost and had a plethora of people message me requesting signed physical copies!

Now people like Stephen King can sell 500 copies in the time it takes to blow their nose... but for a little guy like me, I was in heaven! 

After that I contacted the newspaper and told them about my success... and though a lot of them didn't care and ignored my emails, others interviewed me and I got in the newspaper! Twice! Well one isn't running until Tuesday BUT I'M STILL COUNTING IT!

So I guess the trick to marketing is to just keeping trying. The Curious Case of Simon Todd was published in 2018, but I still managed to get some solid sales almost 3 years after it was released! I mean... George R. R. Martin is hated by SO many people now... but that's a recent thing! His first book was written in 1996! 

Same, George... Same...

So don't give up! Keep on trucking! Great things take time and all that other positive vibe crap that someone says to keep people motivated! You can do the thing... even if the thing is pretty much the devil... 

Did I mention this already? I did? Oh, okay... just checking.

And someday soon, I'm sure YOU TOO can be hated by millions of people for not finishing a series you continue to make thousands of dollars on each and every day! YAY!

I'm only kidding... don't be mad, George. I'm sure you have a good excuse...

... please finish the books, George.  

...Please?

Oh and if you're a reader and not an author... Leave a book review! They're pretty much our bread and butter... Our precious!